September 15

Covid 19: Vaccination Diary

At this point, you might have already read my 3 part commentary about the situation in Germany with the pandamic still going on. In the last part, I have mentioned wanting to do this diary where I talk about my experience with the whole vaccination process, well here it is. I want to talk about how the vaccination, in general, is perceived in Germany, how and what kind of vaccine options you have, and what it was like for me personally to go through all of that.

The vaccine seems to be a double-edged sword, on the one hand, many people believe it’s the cure for everything and it will get us back to a pandamic free life, on the other hand, people are very confused about the different kinds that there are and who should get them, that they might not actually want to get them at all. I am kinda in-between, I have a problem with needles at the doctors’ office in general, so I have fought with myself for a long time about if I should get the vaccine or not. In the end, I have decided that I want to get it to be protected myself, but also help to prevent the virus from mutating and more variants to come up. But I do also get why some people might be scared.

The first vaccines we had in Germany were AstraZeneca from England and the Biontech/Phizer vaccine which was produced in a collaboration of a german and an american company. They are totally different kinds of vaccines, but most people don’t know how vaccines in general work, so that was confusing right off the bat. Kinda like with the articles which were spread on WhatsApp about who was responsible from the pandamic in the first place, which I had talked about in my commentary part two, misinformation was spread very quickly. Some of it intentionally or unintentionally was even reported about on the news, especially AstraZeneca was made to look bad. At the latest when the risk of getting thrombosis was tied to getting vaccinated with it, no one wanted to get it anymore, which lead to many doses just ending up unused and having to be thrown away.

Partially that was due to the priority system we had at first. Because we had so few doses of the vaccines, they were only giving it to the people who needed them the most, because they had the biggest risk of dying if infected with the virus. Starting with very old people, risk patients with pre-existing conditions, and staff in hospitals and retirement homes. Young people were just not allowed to go to their doctors and get the shots, because we did not have enough and the few doses we had were saved up. And the ones who went unsued oftentimes were not able to be reused again or could not be used on younger people because of dumb rules. The priority system was taken down when we got more doses and more different kinds of vaccines were approved by the EU. Right after that happened, my husband and I got our appointments.

When you wanted to get a shot you had different possibilities. You could either put your name on a list at your locals’ doctor’s office and get notified when they had enough vaccine to give it to you. You could also go into a so-called vaccination center which basically was a temporary build-up hospital for the sole purpose of vaccinating people. Or you could wait for one of the possibilities which were kinda Walk-In Events, where they tried to vaccinate as many people as possible on one day, using the empty stadium from football or other buildings that were just not being used because of the pandamic. My husband and I decided to make an appointment in a vaccination center, because it was the best option for me, as I don’t like to go to the doctors’ office and I had hoped the vaccination in a different environment would be easier for me. Our first appointment was at the beginning of July and the second one was at the end of august(because you had to have a certain amount of time in between).

We didn’t get to choose the company where we got the vaccines from, but we could decide on the kind of vaccine we were getting. We wanted to get one of the mRNA vaccines and then got randomly chosen which one we get by the vaccination center(I will abbreviate it with VC from now on). My husband got Moderna and I got the Biontech/Phizer one. When we got to the VC, it was guarded by security which looked kinda intimidating to me, but with a QR code we got in the mail when booking the appointment, it was fairly easy to get in. We were led by arrows on the ground and a tunnel-like structure with more safety inside guiding us to the booths where the doctors were. We were then briefed by a doctor about what kind of vaccine we were getting and what kind of side effect could arise and after we signed some papers, we were led through another tunnel to a small room.

My husband actually had to shove me in the right direction, because even though we were not at a doctor’s office, it still triggered me and I began crying as soon as I got into that room. But I was very lucky to have a doctor(or a nurse, I am not sure) who was very understanding and tried everything to comfort me. She was even tattooed, which was great because normally when I am in situations like that, people love to say “Oh you have tattoos, therefore you can’t be afraid of needles” even though these are two completely different things, mainly because tattoo needles are way smaller and go only about 3mm deep into your skin. Anyways, the doctor talked to me, tried to distract me, and made the whole process as comfortable for me as possible, which I am very grateful for. I even got candy, which might sound very childish, but was actually meant for my circulation not to collapse.

After the shot, we were led to another corridor where we had to sit for about 15min to see if any allergic reactions would occur, which could have been treated then right away by the medical staff. Gladly we did not experience something like that, drank our free water, tried to calm down, and then we got to leave. All in all, I had to say that it was more pleasant than I feared it to be and we got also pretty lucky, because aside from my husband’s left arm being sore right after, we also did not experience any side effects.

Our second appointment actually had to be rescheduled because of my husband’s work, which only means we got it about a week earlier. We also did not really have to make another appointment, because there seemed to be so few people coming in every day, that it would not have been necessary. So we could just show the paper from our last time getting the shot and were lead-in again. Again everything was the same as last time, we got briefed, signed some papers, and were led to the room. And yes, I cried again, but again everything worked out fine. I did not even experience any noteworthy side effects. My husband had some more pain in the right arm, days after the shot, but luckily also nothing worse.

So that was my experience and I am very happy for it to be done. I was very scared, mostly because of my own pre-existing conditions, but maybe also a little bit because of the very strange and confusing way the media talked about it. I can highly recommend you to go to your local’s doctors office(if you can) and have a talk about which vaccine would be the best for you and then maybe they can also help you find an appointment somewhere. Take someone with you when going there, it makes things easier.
And if you don’t want to get vaccinated for whatever reason, I am not here to tell you otherwise. There is a whole debate going on about an indirect vaccination duty, which I do not support. I think everyone should be able to decide for themselves what they want to do. Even though non-vaccinated people should also accept that they have to get tested to participate in certain events or maybe take an extra step to go somewhere in general. It should not be as big of a hurdle to push someone to get vaccinated, but it can’t be that they have the exact same right as vaccinated people, because that would just not make sense safety-wise, right?
So please keep that in mind, this post is not supposed to be an advertisement or something, I just wanted to tell you how it was for me and maybe answer some questions some of you might have. I hope you all stay safe and healthy.

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

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September 3

Covid 19: A German Perspektive (Part 3)

The pandamic was devastating for so many people on so many levels, I don’t want to seem like I am not acknowledging that when writing this post. I actually have already written two parts which you can read where I talked about the effect the pandemic had on my student life *here* and how the German public reacted to some of the rules that were made *here*. In this final part, I want to focus on the positive change that the pandemic might have brought to us as a society. I guess in all of that suffering there has to be some lessons or skills we have learned that might help us going forward.

All of the things I want to talk about are speculation on the basis of what we have developed in the last one and a half years, starting with digitalization. As I have mentioned in part one of this commentary, many schools and universities have adapted to digital learning, they have trained their staff, bought the licenses to various different digital programs such as zoom, and made everything available online. I know professors who have never before even thought about the possibility of digitalizing their work and now they make PowerPoint presentations and upload them every week. It’s because they have to and there is no other possibility to teach the students when it’s forbidden to meet up in a classroom. But of course, we could keep that up when the pandemic is over and try out a kind of hybrid model, which is already talked about in some places. It would mean that every student could decide by themselves what kind of learning environment they would prefer and that actually sounds awesome to me.

Home Office is another thing that was deemed impossible in many workplaces until it had to be tried out for the purpose of staying safe. And mostly everyone was puzzled when it indeed was possible, not only that but for many people, it was just more convenient. They would not have to drive 2 hours to work, which either made them have more free time or time to sleep, both great things. It might also have been easier for people to work in a comfortable environment such as their home rather than sitting in a cubical office the whole day. Companies could even save up on the money which they pay for renting an office building, so it does sound like a win-win situation for most people, right? Why have we not tried it out sooner? I know for some people mainly parents having a place to go to work can be necessary, but maybe we could have a hybrid model here too? Where people could decide themselves: Do I want to go into an office(which can be a temporary one, still cheaper than renting a whole building) or do I want to work from home?

Having work and learning digitalized can also have a positive effect for people who just can’t go there in person for different reasons. Maybe they can’t find an apartment near enough to be there in time every day. Maybe they can’t leave their house, maybe they have to care for someone and so on. I have learned that people from different german states are studying at my University in Hamburg now because it has become possible for so many! Sign languages for example is a subject that is not available to study everywhere, maybe people who want to study that but were not able to get here can now study it from home. My husband got a job in Hannover, which is about 2 hours away from here and would be too far to drive every day, but now he can participate from home too. How great is that?

Corona has also shown us where our system in general might have failed. When it comes to schools for example, because of the virus the public now found out that many schools actually have broken windows that can’t be opened. It came up because when the school took place in person, the teachers were asked to ventilate the rooms properly so that the risk of infection was as low as possible. Some schools just could not do that, which is horrible to know, but hopefully, it will be fixed now. People also began to think more about abuse at home, which has skyrocketed because of the many lockdowns, so hopefully, they will take measures against that too. It introduced wearing masks in public which many Asian countries already do for years and many people in Germany have said they want to keep them here in the future too, especially in cold seasons.

It might sound like I only want to see the good things, but sometimes it’s necessary and it helped me keep my sanity in this kind of situation we all were and still are in. I am sorry for all the people who lost family and friends in these times, to everyone who lost their jobs, had to close their shops or lost part of their childhood, could not live the proper student life, were not able to travel and see the world. The crisis has taken much from us, but we have to see the light in the dark. I hope you still enjoyed this kind of german perspective of the things that have happened. The idea was actually sparked because many people in Germany are currently raging against the vaccination and I wanted to make a kind of journal-like entry about what the vaccination was like for me. But then I thought I should talk about how the situation in Germany is in general and thus you have my three parts now. I think I might still do the vaccination dairy thing, so keep an eye out if you want to know more about what that was like for me.

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

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September 1

Covid 19: A German Perspektive (Part 2)

So last time I talked more about the german student experience with Corona than I had actually planned. If you have not read that but would be interested in it, check it out *here*. Today I want to focus more and the general situation in Germany, how the people felt, and why it might have been so different than in other countries. Again I want to talk about things that got to my attention, I am not talking for every german person who lived through the pandemic up till now and not every student, everything I talk about here is my own opinion and my own take on the things that have happened over the last one and a half years.

Let’s start right off with the events my penpals were most surprised about, to hear that people were protesting against the Corona rules. I don’t have a definitive answer to why people are fighting against the government that much, but I have some ideas that could have lead to that behavior. The first one is anger: My mother and her boyfriend actually wanted to go on a big vacation, after years of not being able to go they booked a flight to Turkey and wanted to go there in April 2020. But then it was canceled due to Turkey not wanting tourists to come in anymore for obvious reasons. The first reaction of my mother’s boyfriend was anger, he was angry not to go on that vacation he had planned and earned himself and he needed to direct this emotion at someone. That’s where reason two comes into play: Fake News. He read an article shared on WhatsApp about Trump developing and spreading the virus to gain some kind of control over the world. That’s when his anger found a scapegoat: he wanted to believe Trump is responsible, to be able to be angry at him since he could not really be angry at a virus he did not understand. It was easier to believe in a shadowy figure with bad intentions than an invisible thing that acted irrationally.

There were many different articles like that out there, blaming multiple different people for the pandemic and its consequences. They were shared in person and all over the internet and people did not only wanted to believe them, some did not even have any other source to tell them what was going on. In their confusion and urge to wrap their heads around what was causing the government to make such harsh decisions they were eager to jump at the first opportunity for someone to explain to them what was going on, even if it sounded crazy because what was happening around them was crazy too. When the government later tried to explain more, it was already too late, people had made up their minds and they did not plan on changing them. A big distrust between a part of the public and the government with their doctors trying to explain what happened with science arose. Again: it was just easier to believe in an organization of criminals who created the virus than to listen to the explanations about how a virus from a bat was transferred to humans and why it was now necessary to wear masks because of it.

I don’t want to say those people were dumb, but maybe a bit naive and easy to manipulate. Which was sadly almost instantly used by the people who had problems with the government before. Basically, every group left or right who had some kind of issue with either our Chancellor Merkel, the form of government we have or something related to that used the chaos Corona caused to get more people to march with them. The so-called “Querdenker(lateral thinker)” movement was born out of the unity of all those people, which actually surprised everyone since it must have been the first time ever where people from the far left and the far right came together. They organized so many different protests all over Germany that if you have seen a news report about protest, you might have seen photos of them marching through the streets, neglecting the Corona safety rules, and not being stoped. Why have they not been stopped but at some point even lead by the police, is what you might be asking and it’s a good question, hard to answer though.

In a democracy you should always have the right to protest, if you have not and have to fear getting beaten up or arrested for speaking your mind, you live in a dictatorship or something radical like that. So in general I guess having these protests is a good sign of democracy working or it shows the flaws of it, depends on your point of view. Anyway, that’s the biggest reason why Germany could not just forbid events like that. They have tried to make them as safe as possible, by ruling that protests can only take place with enough distance between the participants and them wearing masks. But as I have already mentioned that was mostly ignored and when hundreds of people, in some cities even thousands of them do not obey, what is the police able to do? Leading them through the streets, trying to prevent them from harming others, and hopefully ending the event as soon as possible, was the most reasonable thing I guess.

It was still hard to see that happening on TV for many people, who had to buy and wear their masks to go grocery shopping or to work. Masks and the ruling on them is a whole topic for itself actually. We began using cloth masks for the start of the pandamic, they could be made by anyone at home, which was not only cheaper but also the only possible option. The demand for medicals masks would have been so big, that the government could not have provided enough for everyone. But when they had bought enough from who knows where they ruled that now people were not allowed to wear cloth masks anymore, only medical masks were deemed safe enough. That was a huge problem because it was also advised to not use the medicals masks more than once, meaning that we went from cheaps masks that you could wash and reuse to having to buy a new mask every time you wanted to leave the house.

So again people got angry, about being forced to buy masks and spend money some might not even have, while thousands of protesters were shown not doing that on TV every day. Small businesses were angry about not getting the help they were promised in time, causing some of them to have to close. Parents were angry because they did not know when and for how long schools would open again, and how to balance their work-life with having to care for their children 24/7 and the list goes on and on. What I want to say is that it’s totally valid to feel confused and be angry about what has happened in this time of crisis. But I hope many people have also learned and maybe changed their minds about what caused all of this to happen and why the government acted as it did. It might not have been perfect, not all decisions made were the best but it was the first time for all of us to deal with problems like this. And maybe we will be more prepared for future situations because of it, not future pandemics I hope, but children learning from home, a new perspective on Work-Life-Balance and working together for a common goal. That’s what I want to talk about in my final entry of this series: positive change.

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

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August 30

Covid 19: A German Perspektive (Part 1)

Covid 19 better known and often referred to in Germany as Corona seemingly came out of nowhere and started to mess with all of our lives around 2 years ago. I can vividly remember how I got my first tattoo in Hamburg, only weeks before we got into our first lockdown, how I was running around unphased and driving in busses, even though the virus was already spreading. It’s very strange to think back at it now to be honest. It was the last time I saw my friends and the fellow students of my university for a long time. And since it’s been so long, I thought that I could maybe write about how if effected me personally and give all of my non-german viewers an idea of what it was like in my country. I will touch on topics of fear, protest, vaccination and postive change, so if any of that might trigger you in some way, I suggest on maybe skipping this post and enjoy one of my others. If you are still here, then let me take you back to march 2020.

I can’t remember anymore, but I don’t think we were the first country to take measures against Corona. In the beginning, we only had some news covarge about what happend in China, but I would say only a few people actually knew what happend. I was so clueless actually, that I got a tattoo of a bat, which has nothing to do with Corona and never will, but people like to joke about it, when I tell them about the time I got it. Everything was actually so new to us back then, that we did not even had a german word for the concept of a lockdown, which is why we just used the english term and never came up with a german one after. It was actually something that I personally had never experienced before. The only “lockdown”-esuq situation I was in, was when it snowed so heavly in winter, that I did not get to go to school, because the busses were not driving.

Because it was such a new phanomenon, nobody knew how long a lockdown needed to be to be effective. But since my new semester at university startet in april already, I soon got to think about what it might look like if I was not allowed to step foot inside of my faculty. I actually thought that I might have to stop studing for a while, because I really did not believe that online classes would be a thing in Germany. Not because I did not believe learning online would be possible, but because I highly doubted that classes being online in general could be a possibility in Germany. When I told my penpals about it back then, they did not understand my worries at first, because they thought: Germany is such a modern and rich country, why should that be a problem? I don’t want to go into politics deeply here, but from what I can tell, the government really was the problem when it comes to technological development. The Internet and it’s possibilities in general just did not seem to intrest the people in charge as much, maybe it even scared them.

“The Internet is new land for all of us” was a quote of our Chancelor Angela Merkel that went viral in 2013, because it was so funny. Back then of course Facebook already exsited, mostly all of the plattforms and apps that we know today, were already present back then. But as funny as that might have been, it really displayed how unfit our government was to tackle issues like digitalization, because to them the Internet really way a new place. They just had not payed much attention to it, because they felt like they would’nt need to. So 7 years before the pandamic hit Germany, our politicans began to think about stuff like tablets in classes and online seminars for the first time. And in 2020 it just did not feel like much had changed since then, which is why most people thought online classes would fail at first. But suprisingly they did not.

When I speak about what happend, I can only talk about my personal experiences, about what happend at my university, at my work and my envoiroment. I do not want to say I know how everyone felt or how every state acted and just wanted to make they clear once again. I don’t know how but Hamburg and my university actually managed to buy a zoom lisence and get almost all classes online in less then a month. They were able to show the teachers and professors how to use it and even though it might have been a bit cringy at first, everyone did really try their best to make it work. The only thing they did not do was actually handing out equipment, so only people with a stable internet connection and a PC, phone or tablet that support the zoom software were actually able to take part in it. That might have been the only thing I would have critisied back then, but since I was one of the lucky few to get a borrowed PC, I really could not complain.

I only got a PC because before the lockdown and everything, I actually applied for my first job ever. As some of you may know from my old posts I actually work as a student assitant in a project of my university that aims at creating a digital dictonary for german sign language(DGS). My work requires me to be able to use a certain software that people at the university itself have developed, which is why I was not able to use any PC, but a certain type and it had to be hooked up to the universities servers somehow. They actually used the fact that the computers in my faculty were not used and got them for us, to work with them at home. And thus I also had them when the new semester started, which I was and still am very grateful for, because it made working in zoom classes so much easier, than it would have been with my normal laptop. But I know how many other people had problem with their home office set up, so maybe don’t take me as the best example. Many people struggled and even though things were working, they were far from perfect.

There are many things I could tell you about the one and a half years of digital university. For example, I could tell you about how easy it seemed to be for my deaf professors to adapt to the situation, because they were using videochat for a long time already and they had no problem signing within the frame of the camera, but we students sure did. Or about how I met a student who tried to set up a digital room for meet and greets where he could try and recreate the feeling of meeting new people at the campus, talking with friends and just not only using the technological possibilities for learning porpouses. Or this one professor who cared more about how much work he would have when checking the digital test, then about the saftey of his students when having to take this text in person when we were at some of the highest corona case numbers in winter! All in all I would say everything has worked out much better than anyone might have expected, but there is still stuff to improve upon.

Improvement is the last point I want to talk about, connected to university. But since the post is already so long, I guess I will have to make a part 2 or 3 to tell you about the other thoughts and topics I had teased xD Hope that is okay for you and that you are still intrested in the rest 😉 Back to the topic: Improvement seems to be a big problem, because noone wants to invest in it. Why? Because they think a situation like this will never come again and “hopefully”(for some people) everything will go back to normal. In my eyes, that’s a very problematic way of thinking, because I don’t think the situation before was perfect and everything we would improve on now, would also benefit people later. Stuff like Home Office accsessability, online learning and so on. But I fear that most people in Germany who are in charge, still have not understood how important things like that can be. To say it with the words of one of the students I had a class with: “I really hope we don’t go back to stone age, after the pandamic is over”.

In my next post about the topic, I want to talk about why there were and still are so many protests about the lockdowns and vaccinations. But keep in mind, all of this is out of my experience and following my opinion. I do not talk for all german people or students in general. Thanks for understanding.

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

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August 13

Exhibition “Broken” by Reiinku

Hello, people of Wonderland! Recently I took part in a very special exhibition and I wanted to tell you about it 🙂 The exhibition took place in an art studio called Resdient Creative, where you can get tattooed but also chill and just be surrounded by creativity and maybe be creative yourself. It was made by Daria Reiin aka Reiinku and thoughtfully set up in a cellar under the studio. The exhibition is up until the end of the month and I would highly recommend you going there if you would happen to be in Hamburg, Germany^^ But keep in mind that you have to make an appointment first, stay safe and healthy!

Official poster of the exhibition with a close up of the mai piece: a girl and her oni mask falling. Text says: 31 July. 31 August 2021, Broken(in japanse and english)" on the left side: "Exhibition by Reeinku" on the right: "of masks and inner demons".

The room you see in the photo was actually hidden behind a curtain and filled up with smoke, so the lighting would really come to play. It was really cool to see the art being framed by the room, which kinda looked like a piece of art itself with the shibari-styled ropes and other decorations. You could really say going in there was an experience, it was not only about viewing the art itself but feeling the eeriness and the exhibition as a whole. It was really interesting and I can’t say that I have experienced anything like that ever before. Of course, it’s never the same in the pictures, it’s something to really be felt in real-time.

Picture shows a cella with white walls and many ropes in shibari style tying everything together. At the end of the room there is a jean jacket with the main art piece on it, with two ringlights shining at it. Infront of it are diffrent other art pieces haning.

The concept behind the exhibition referring to its name “broken” was the social concept of wearing masks. Maybe to adjust to a certain environment or to hide something, we don’t want others to see, many people wear a kind of mask on a daily basis. And some people might be wearing their masks for so long, that they can’t even imagine life without them anymore. So what would happen if some of those masks begin to crack, break, and shatter, revealing what has been sheltered underneath. And what would we see then? Would it be the same person that put the mask on in the first place or would they have been changed?

Some of these questions might get answered, through the paintings we see hanging in the room. They are of two different people. One wearing a mask to look like a pretty girl, maybe the white represents being pure. But when it crumbles, the mask reveals that there is something dark underneath, something dangerous also being represented by the flower wilting away. On the other side, we have a person wearing a mask to look angry, hideous even, but the cracks reveal a beautiful and loving face, emphasized by the flower in its full glory. So you could see it that way: Some people try to look pretty, but they are ugly on the inside, whether as people who seem angry on the outside, might be loving in reality.

A Collage of the other art pieces, on the left side: the first picture show hald of a face wearing an oni demon marsk with shar theeth and horns, the secound one show a flower blooming, the third one shows the other half of the face with the same mask, but crombeling around the eye, reavealing a much nicer face behind the mask. On the right side: there is hald of a face looking lighe a beautiful face but with a big crack, the secound picture is a flower wilting away and the thirs one is the other half of the face again crumbeling around the eyes reavailng a dark, dangerous looking monster underneeth.

The main piece of the exhibition was a jean jacket, entangled in ropes with the drawing of a girl losing her mask entirely. I especially like how the jacket itself is held up, it looks very dynamic, almost as if you could imagine the girl wearing the jacket while being shocked about the loss of her mask and possibly a big part of her identity. The mask is of a japanese demon called Oni being portrait with his horns, yellow glowing eyes, and sharp teeth. The girl behind the mask wears a little make-up, she almost looks innocent in comparison. But she too has horns, so maybe she did not lose everything with the broken mask. Maybe a part of her already identifies with the demon she wore. I like to interpret that as a girl who is shy and maybe scared but wearing a mask of confidence to protect herself. So when the mask falls down, some of this confidence still remains, meaning that she is now able to protect herself without the mask too or it could mean the demon is still inside her, even if it seems like she might have lost it.

A photo of the main piece, a jean jacket with flowers on the arms and a innocent looking girl on the back, a mask he wore broke in half and is falling down. The mask is of a japanese demon called oni and it has horns, same as the girl has.

All in all, it was a very special and intriguing experience, I am very happy to have taken part in it! What was especially interesting and might not be possible in every exhibition, is that the artist herself led us through and talked with us about her intentions for every piece. I might not have done justice writing about it here and now, but like I said in the beginning: if you get the chance to experience it yourself, do it 😉 If there are any other exhibitions done by Reiinku, I will be definitely sure to check them out! And if you want to check the amazing artist behind this exhibition out, you can do so here:

Reiinku’s Instagram page: https://www.instagram.com/reiinku/?hl=de
Reiinku’s website: https://reiinku.com/

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

Category: Art, Personal Life | LEAVE A COMMENT
August 4

About Crystals and Magic

Hello, people of Wonderland, and welcome back to a story post of mine^^ With this post I don’t want to be informative since I am no expert on the field, but I want to tell you about the experiences I made. So keep that in mind when reading it, I am a mere beginner, if so at all xD But I am very interested in all of that, so I wanted to tell you about my research and findings!

Collage of the diffrent Itemas I got and will talk about in this post: a purple amathyst cluster, a white/tranparent selenite heart, a turmaline, a rose quarz pendelum and a glas wand filled with cleary crystals.
I got these pictures from the Etsy Shop and I will use them again and put a link to the shops below! So all right go to the Etsy shop owners 😛

Since I was a child I had an affinity with stones. I liked to collect them especially when they were shiny or smooth, take them with me as souvenirs from trips, or just keep them around to fiddle with them in my hands. They always seemed to make me calmer or happier for no reason or at least no apparent reason that I could think of. Lately, I have been down because of many stressful things happening in my life and my mother bought me a stone necklace, which is completely unrelated, she did not do it because I was sad, but because she likes to gift me pretty things. Anyways this stone necklace sparked my interest in stones again because while wearing it, I actually felt better and I loved playing around with the pendant above my chest.

I started thinking about rock tumbling, which is the craft of making smooth rocks for jewelry or decoration purposes. But that’s a bit complicated because you need several fairly expensive things and at best have a cella or porch where you can let your rocks tumble so they don’t disturb yourself or your neighbors. Unfortunately, I don’t have both at the moment so I discarded the thought of taking it on as a hobby for now. But I still couldn’t get rocks out of my head and I started researching about the properties many nature-based believes such as Wicca and Pagan ascribe to them. They say they can be used for healing, cleansing an area, or protecting it. Even though when they talk about it, they refer to them as crystals, which sound so better much better than rocks, so that’s what I will be calling them mostly too from here on 😛

Of course, it’s totally normal to be skeptical at first and think: “How can some rocks or crystals or whatever you want to call them, aid me in my daily life?” and I think it’s totally valid to be asking questions like this. I consider myself a rational atheist person, so I normally don’t believe in stuff that isn’t proven, but I always had this spiritual side to me too and this thought of: “Why shouldn’t there be some magic in this world?”. Maybe that’s why I like to write about it in my stories too xD And since I am an open person in general, I thought I should at least try it out and see if some crystals can bring a positive change to my life, no matter how small it might be.

On this topic, I also want to talk about a psychological effect called a self-fulfilling prophecy. I am sure you have heard of it before since it’s also used in books and movies sometimes 😉 Basically, the effect describes that when a person thinks something will happen hard and long enough, it actually can happen. Of course, you can’t wish for a puppy and magically get it, but some thoughts can trigger actual physical or mental reactions from your body. Most of them are sadly bad reactions like panic attacks, becoming sick, or having a false pregnancy just to name a few. But they can have positive reactions too, for example, the same way they can trigger a panic attack they can also stop it or you can literally talk some positivity or bravery into yourself if you need it. So coming back to the topic of crystals even though they might not have a positive effect on people’s lives which could be proven scientifically, it is very well possible that it still has that effect on some people.

So with all of that said, the best-case scenario would be that these stones actually help me feel better or more balanced in life, either because of an actual nature-based energy effect or because of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Worst case scenario would be, that those crystals would really just be shiny stones, but then I could still use them for a cool decoration of my home or even as references when I am drawing! So basically I can’t really go wrong here, that’s why I looked for some stones and their meaning on the internet and bought some to try them out! If you stuck with me till this part of the post, I guess you are at least somewhat interested in the topic, so I will tell you now which stones I bought and what effects they are supposed to have, enjoy! And a quick note: As I am writing this article non of the crystals have arrived yet, which is why I am using the pictures from the Etsy shops(all rights go to them!) and tell you about the stuff I have researched. I can’t tell you about the actual effects yet, but I might write a second post after some time 😉 Let me know if you would be interested in it!

Picture of the wand: a glas vile filled with clear crytsals(unpolished) with a polished clear crytsal ball at the end and a polished clear crystal tip, The ends are connected to the vile with a metal strip.
Magic wand made with clear crystals by KristallundKessel on Etsy


The first thing I got was actually not even “just a crystal” it’s actually a magic wand made out of glass and clear crystals 😛 Now I know what you might think, but hear me out first xD A magic wand is actually used in some wiccan and pagan practices, but not in the way you would think from seeing movies and reading books 😛 So there are no flames or light supposed to come out of it, when you use the right spell, they are more used in rituals to focus your own energy and lead them to objects you do your rituals with, kinda like a conductor. There are also supposed to help with sending negative energy away from your body. And they can come in many different shapes and sizes such as full carving out of a crystal or being made out of a tree twig. Some can be bought in shops, but technically you could also make your own out of things you find in nature that you are somewhat intrigued by. Now I am not crafty when it comes to woodcarving and stuff and as I mentioned before, I am intrigued by crystals, so when I saw this wand, I really wanted to get it and try it out 😛 If you want to know more about the topic of wands, I can recommend one of the videos I have watched on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLKA9ECQ-vc (Enchanted Endeavours Ep. 14 by Harmony Nice).

The hand of the seller holding some random Turmaline crystals, which are black and look like they are cut right out of a mountain, very rough.
Raw Turmanline crystal by KristallundKessel on Etsy


The second item I got is one of these raw turmaline crystals, you might have seen them used in jewelry before, but in the refined version where they can actually shine in different colors. I have to say from the picture they remind me of coal a bit, but I am mesmerized but the deep black color of them too. Like most black crystals those are said to be very good at getting rid of negative energy, protect you from new negative energy, and thus are one of the most powerful protection stones out there. Some of the people I came across on my research actually advise having one of them by your side at all times(if you believe in that of course, no pressure). They are also said to make the user be more aware of certain developments and processes in their lives, which makes them able to control them better, which actually sounds perfect for a little control freak like me xD

The seller holding a rose quarz pendelum on a short metal chain.
Rosequarz Pendlum crystal by KristallundKessel on Etsy

The third item I got is a rose quartz pendulum, again something which has a second practical purpose aside from the energy effects. Of course, you have seen or heard about pendulums before too, they are mostly used for deviation and radiesthesia. Now we have another one of these beliefs VS science dilemmas because of course, actually predicting the future is highly unlikely. But you can see this pendulum more as a way to understand what you want subconsciously instead.
There are kinda two ways I have learned about how to do that, one easy and one a bit more complicated way xD The easy way is basically just to asking the pendulum a question and then thinking about what you want the answer to be. Of course, technically you would not need a pendulum for that, but I guess it can help some people. The other way has to do with meditating. Basically, you try to let your subconsciousness send small waves through your nerves that get the pendulum to swing a certain way. The goal here is not to just swing it consciously yourself, but to let your subconscious mind take over a bit. I have not tried it yet, so I don’t know if it will work, but maybe I can tell you in the future 😉
The crystal used to make the pendulum is rose quartz, maybe the most popular one of these crystals to be used in Jewelry, so I am sure you have seen it before! It’s said to be the most popular healing stone too, which is also why it’s used often in these face rollers to make a headache go away for example. It’s also said to be the stone of love and might connect you or be of help in love rituals 😉

The seller holding a heart shaped selenite crystal in her hand, very polished and about half the size of her hand.
Selenite Heart by Adelaidespath on Etsy

Next up is a selenite heart, which I want to use as a palm stone. A palm stone is basically a smooth crystal specifically used for fiddling around with. Selenite seems to be perfect for that since it’s said to calm the mind and help with hyperactivity such as heighten the concentration level and give vitality. I really like how big it is and I already kinda know I will love touching it xD It’s also very popular, maybe because of its ascribed properties or maybe because it’s a very soft stone that can be carved a bit more easily, so you can see many selenite stones with engraving on them. I specifically decided against that, because I wanted to keep it as smooth as possible^^

The seller holding the amathyst crystal cluster, which also looks very rough and natural.
Amethyst Cluster crystal by KristallundKessel on Etsy

Last but not least I will be getting an amethyst cluster^^ I got really interested in it because amethyst is actually my birthstone and these stones should connect very well with the user, thus working even better. Also, my favorite color is purple and I always wanted to have a raw stone cluster like this anyways xD They not only look very stunning but they can also be used to recharge other crystals with energy again. So what I gathered from my research is it’s always a good idea to have one of them around 😉 Amethysts themselves are said to be is said to have very calming energy as well, which is why many people sleep with it near their beds and it’s also said to reduce anxiety.

Those are all the crystals I will be getting hopefully soon and I am looking forward to them very much. Even though I am not really sure if they will really help me mentally or physically in any way, I try to keep an open mind. And to be honest, knowing that I will be having them in my apartment soon and being able to look at them and fiddle around with some already makes me happy. So I think I really can’t lose here 😉 If you are interested to know if they actually have worked or not, let me know and I might make a part two^^ Also tell me about your experiences with stones and crystals or questions that you might have about the topic. So feel free to leave a comment!

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

Category: Personal Life, Witchy Things | LEAVE A COMMENT
July 28

Frequently asked questions about Tattoos

Since I will be tattooed again soon, I am in the mood for talking about one of my passions a lot currently 😛 I just wrote an article about some law issues concerning the artists in Germany, this time I want to focus on some soon-to-be clients, maybe it’s one of you 😉 I get some questions about tattooing asked over and over again, and since I think it’s only natural to ask them and informing people is important, I want to now present you exactly that: my most frequently asked questions and my personal answers to them. Enjoy and feel free to ask anything else related to that topic, if you feel like your questions, in particular, have not been answered yet!

Does it hurt, how much does it hurt and where does it hurt the most?
I 100% get why you would ask that question, since how would you imagine that kind of pain if you never experienced it yourself? I was also very afraid of my first tattoo, which is why I went with a rather small one, to kinda dip my toe into the water and see if I would survive it. So that’s my tip in general for all of you who would want to get a tattoo, but you don’t know if you can stand the pain. You don’t have to get a big one the first time around, my first one was done in 10min 😉
But to fully answer the question: I actually can’t xD The problem is that pain is very different from person to person. Let’s compare me and my husband for example We got a partner tattoo on the same day from the same artist and for both of us, it was a tattoo after a longer period of not getting tattoed, so you say we were not used to it, as might be now. My husband did actually almost fall asleep while getting tattooed, he described the feeling as a kind of massage and not really a pain. I also think that tattoo was one of the less painful ones because it was in a good spot and was fairly small(the longer you get tattooed, the more even small movements will hurt), but I think I would never be able to fall asleep like that because it would be a way to irritating for me. And that’s exactly the problem you could feel either way or maybe even totally different, so it’s a very personal thing, you have to find out for yourself.

Image shows a Tattoo Pain Chart: Where It Hurts Most and Least, and More in diffrent colors.
https://www.healthline.com/health/body-modification/pain-tattoos-chart

There are some pictures around the internet on which people try to describe areas in which the pain is harder and easier to withstand, but again that’s very personal. Looking at one of the pictures I found online, the chest area is highly sensitive and almost too painful for most people to get tattooed. My husband again got a tattoo on the chest. This time he actually spoke of feeling pain, but not in a hard way. He said it felt less than a massage and more like tattooing is supposed to feel xD So you can kinda look at the picture and see that most areas with less body fat, where the skin is almost resting on the bones, are more painful to get tattooed, in general. But that’s again, different from person to person. What most people I know actually describe as a very painful spot, most beginners(me too xD) choose for some reason is under the wrist where the veins are showing, that’s painful, but it’s blue in the chart, so… just don’t trust it too much 😉

Is it like getting a shot at the doctors’ office?
I can say is that getting tattooed can not be compared to getting vaccinated. Many people seem to compare it since both things are done with the help of a needle but in totally different ways. When getting a shot at the doctors’ office, the needle has to go deep into your skin and has to be thick enough for the medicine to be pumped through. In a tattoo shop, the needles are fairly small and have no hole in them, because the ink is picked up not led through the needle. Also instead of going deep under your skin, a good artist will only pierce your skin about 3mm. So if you are maybe afraid of needles from doctors(which I actually am) that does not mean you have to be afraid of tattoo needles too 🙂

How much does a tattoo cost?
Again, a frequently asked question: hard to answer or generalize. The “problem” is that it’s always hard to value art because it can have a different value for different people. Just look at Picasso’s paintings, do you find them artsy, or do they look like a toddler drew them to you? Everyone has a different perception of art, which is also why everyone would pay a different price for it. Tattoo artists have to find the right balance between getting paid for the work hours they put into designing and actually tattooing a piece, but also for the art value and the materials they use, and other costs they have. For example, a studio in Hamburg will have to pay more rent, than a studio in a small town would have to, meaning they have bigger costs which they have to compensate for more, which is why tattoos in Hamburg generally cost more money than in the town where I went to school. So In Hamburg for example, you would normally not get a tattoo under 100-120€(walk-in days* are an exception) because it would actually not make sense for the artist, since they would not get a win and maybe not even enough money to pay for their costs. The costs for tattoos I have gotten in Hamburg vary between 150€ and 900€(for one design) as of now. And there can be big differences! For example, I properly already have my new tattoo on the back of my right arm when this post goes online and I will have paid 350€ for it. But I already have a tattoo planned on the exact same placement on my other arm, which will cost me around 850€. I can’t tell you why one artist can offer their tattoo for that cheap and the other one can’t but they will have their reasons and most of the time, when you want to get a design, you have to accept the price that they give you. Please never take the design and search for a bad artist who would just do it, just to get the design for cheaper. If it’s important enough for you to go through such lengths to get it, please consider paying the right artist for it, it will be important to him too. And saving is also always an option 🙂

How do you decide on a tattoo?
That’s always an interesting questions xD It might tie in with the next one… Actually, I am one of those people who decide on a tattoo kinda spontaneously. I will scroll through Instagram, not even really search for a new tattoo but always kinda stumbling upon one (a WannDo**) 😛 I will normally think about it for a few days, trying to either print it or position it on my phone, so I can hold it up to where I would want to get it, to see if it looks good or not. It’s a feeling, does it feel right, do I want to change it, will it fit with my other tattoos, what could it mean for me, and so on. And if this process is done and I still want to get it, I will ask for a price and then think about if I have enough money for it or not, mostly planning an appointment shortly after 😛

How can you be sure that you will still like it after years? (And how does it age?)
That’s the question I was talking about, many people say they could never ever get a tattoo because they can’t decide on a design, since they can’t know if they will like it in 5-10 years or not. I also know someone who pins a design of a tattoo on their wall and looks at it for one year and if he still likes it, he will get it xD For me, that sounds kinda ridiculous since I know that if you overthink a tattoo, you will ALWAYS find something wrong with it, as you can do with everything. And also having a tattoo hanging on your wall is something completely different from having it on your skin, because a tattoo becomes a part of your body pretty quickly. It’s hard to explain, but it quickly feels as if you always had that tattoo even if it’s only one month old. Maybe that’s because you are constantly seeing it and your mind is kinda adapting to that. That means, that even if there is a small thing in the design you don’t like, you won’t think about it for too long, at least that’s my experience. I have a tattoo with some hands, that look kinda wonky compared to the rest of the design, but I never look at it that way, I just see the whole thing looking great on my arm, making me smile 😉
When it comes to tattoos aging, everyone handles that differently. For one, you can always prevent your tattoo from aging too quickly, wear sunscreen or long clothing for example, but there are many tips and tricks. You can also touch up a tattoo every few years, depending on where you get the tattoo you will have/ or you can let it be touched up more often or less often. Getting a tattoo on the hand, for example, requires getting it touched up every 2-3 years to make it stay sharp because the skin on the hand is always moving and being under a lot of pressure from washing your hands, touch things, and working with them. A tattoo on your arm might only have to be touched up every 20 years or maybe never(depending on how you take care of it). Also, some people never get their tattoos touched up and they love how they age with them, so there are multiple different possibilities, different from person to person again 😉

Is there something I should be aware of/careful with?
That’s not exactly a question I get asked often, but since this post should be as helpful as possible, I would like to give you some tips on the way 🙂 Also because there are some things I gladly personally did not experience but heard about, which you can be aware of.
The first thing obviously is not to get tattooed at home or in the backyard of a building or something. Tattooing always has to be a sterile process to make sure the open wound you get will not be infected. Therefore the artist and his workplace have to be clean and you have to feel comfortable to be tattooed in the environment. If you don’t feel comfortable, you have the right to leave, don’t feel obligated to get the tattoo, if the circumcises feel fishy.
Another situation to be aware of would be that there are black sheep everywhere and recently I heard about a tattoo artist who used women and treated them badly. He offered them to get a tattoo but instead of paying with money, he wanted to be paid in sexual intercourse. Of course, sex is not a bad thing in general, but using it in exchange for something is mostly not a good idea and I know no serious tattoo artist who would ever offer that. So for me, that’s a red flag to look out for and a sign to leave and look for another artist.
Also always look for other work that the artist has done to be sure that he can tattoo you the design you want. Instagram is a good platform for artists to show their previous work and I have always made good experiences with that. Some artists don’t have a big presence on Instagram, but they have their old work printed out in some books or on a website. Never let yourself be tattooed by someone you don’t know, have not heard about before, and can’t find anything on the internet or his studio. It’s not about not giving new artists a chance, but protecting yourself from people who have not actually learned the craft. You are not automatically a tattoo artist, just because you have got your hands on a tattoo machine, but some people think they are and they will proclaim the title. So be aware of that.

All in all getting tattooed is something really great for me personally and maybe it is for you too. If you think about getting one, but there are questions holding you back, I really hope that I was able to help you. Of course, thinking about a tattoo, in general, is not a bad thing, just don’t overthink it too much 😉 And not wanting to get one, is also a valid opinion, but maybe you were still curious to know about it and I was able to help you with that too! Anyway, I wish you good luck with your plan.

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

*Walk-In-Day: That’s an event which is often held at a tattoo studio, where the artists prepare some sheets with WannaDo with the goal of tattooing as many people as possible, basically everyone who walks in 😉
**WannaDo: That’s a design which the tattoo artist has come up with by themself, without clients wish behind it, so it’s basically just something the artist themselves wants to do^^

Category: Personal Life, Tattoos | LEAVE A COMMENT
July 14

Let’s talk about Tattoos

In Germany, there is currently a debate going on about if Tattoos are considered art and therefore the people making the tattoos are artists. That might sound a bit strange to you, but it’s actually a legal issue since if you are recognized as an artist in Germany you get certain insurance benefits. So it’s not only about the art itself but also about the people behind it. Since I am not designing tattoos myself, but I love having them and I will get some more this summer, I really want to speak about it here on my blog. And I want to start by telling you about parts my own tattoo journey. You notice that I will use the word “tattoo artist” a lot, which kinda seems to defeat the purpose here, but in English, that’s the only word I know and in Germany they are only called “Tätowierer”. Maybe that will change soon 😉

I actually got my first tattoo when I was only 16 together with my mother. In Germany, you are technically only allowed to get a tattoo when you are 18 years old, but when you have the consent of your parents and find an artist who is willing to tattoo you, you can legally do it sooner. For my first tattoo, I choose something small, because I was very afraid of the pain and I kinda wanted to test out what it was liked to get tattoed. It was a good idea, but I sadly did not have the best experience in general, because my artist back then was not very understanding… he was like: “If you cry about pain, you should not get a tattoo.”. He was really not the best example of what a tattoo artist should be, but we will come back to that 😉 My first tattoo took about 10min, but it felt way longer, but I felt so good after it.

Why get a tattoo with 16 you might ask yourself? I always was very fond of how they looked at other people, but it also was a psychological thing for me. I was bullied a lot in school and there was nothing I could really do about it. The short version of it was, that I felt like I lost control over my life, and getting a tattoo, making a lifelong decision like that, felt like I was taking back that control. So getting a tattoo is not always about aesthetics, it can also help people cope with troubles in their life, deal with trauma or grow their self-esteem. There is a popular meme about tattoo artists being lowkey therapists and I guess it’s not totally wrong. Sitting up to 8 hours next to a person talking can really connect people 😉

But that is only part of what they do, with their art. But what is art? That’s quite hard to define. “Art is a highly diverse range of human activities engaged in creating visual, auditory, or performed artifacts— artworks—that express the author’s imaginative or technical skill, and are intended to be appreciated for their beauty or emotional power.” (lumenlearning) is one of the quotes you can find on the topic and they all sound poetic like this one. Art can be everything, is a statement as helpful as the last one. But in all of that, there is a piece of truth. Technically everyone can be an artist from a child with a crayon drawing on the walls, up to a person creating a doodle at school. But in this case, it’s about earning money with it, so it’s about creating visual, auditory, or performed artifacts that express the author’s imaginative or technical skill, to be appreciated for their beauty or emotional power by the client.

The Artists’ social fund which would grant the insurance benefits has a slightly easier to understand the definition of what to do, to get in. The requirement is “the exercise of a permanent, self-employed artistic activity on a commercial basis” and to be someone “who creates, practices or teaches music, performing or visual arts”. Now you would think, the problem here is not the art part itself, since tattoo artists do create visual art, right? Well in Germany they are seen as Artisans because tattooing itself “does not become artistic in that in individual cases not working according to existing patterns or stencils, but the motif itself is designed; because this is also typical for handicrafts.”. Basically, that means that the people who decide on who gets into the fund and who does not, think that tattoo artists only do the craft of tattooing, bringing a design onto a person’s skin. And maybe in the past, in some cases that was true since some tattoo people work with the designs from others, sometimes even without asking them. But the vast majority and what I personally think are the better tattoo artists, only tattoo their own designs.

Actually, I have a friend who, let’s say falls in love with designs easily and when she sees something, she really wants to have EXACTLY that design. But when searching for an artist who would tattoo her that, she has some problems since most artists will tell her, that they will try to recreate the design in their style or not tattoo her at all. Not because they are arrogant or just don’t want to work with her, but because it would not feel right for them. And if that’s not artistic, then tell me what is. A good tattoo artist should not only be good at their craft (technical skill), but also at helping the client get his design on paper(imaginative skill), work on it until it’s ready(to be appreciated for their beauty or emotional power), and also give emotional support, for the process of tattooing but also in general. What I would have wanted to say to my artist who did my very first tattoo: If you don’t like to work with people, that have emotions, don’t become a tattoo artist. In Art, it’s never about you, but it’s always about them.

My tattoo journey is far from being over and I knew the answer to the initial question all along, of course tattoos are art and their creators are artists who should defently be taking in by the Artist’ social fund as soon as possible! Not only for support but also for apprechiation of they are and what they do. If you’d like you can let me know in the comments what you think about it, in a fair manner of course 🙂 And if you would like to know more about the topic or my tattoos in general, let me know!

Greetings and good wishes
The Mad Hattress

Category: Personal Life, Tattoos | LEAVE A COMMENT